Friday, March 20, 2009

Round 2, Day 1 Picks

While my nature bracket is in last place in my league, I am undaunted – 3 of my 4 final four picks are still intact! (That’s the Wolverines of Michigan, the Spartans of Michigan State, and my pick-to-win-it-all Xavier Musketeers. The Cornell Bears faltered though… dang it!) We’ve got a big day of picture taking at the Dallas Arboretum planned, but here are my predictions for today’s games – which, in case you missed last time, are based SOLELY on how each team’s mascot would fare in an actual battle royale. Like a caged fight in a zoo.

First: I’m picking A&M over UConn, just out of loyalty. Miracles can happen! I am wishing for a big upset tomorrow.

Next, I pick Purdue to topple the Washington Huskies. I don’t know for sure what a Boilermaker is, but I know Purdue’s webpage has trains on it. I pick the Purdue Trains to run over those Washington Huskies (though, as a dog lover, I don’t like it).

Though I should support the Maryland Terrapins for Jeremy’s sake, I pick the Memphis Tigers to tackle the turtles. To their credit, the Terps showed a valiant effort in their victory over the Cal Bears. Highly unfeasable in real life, but, hey, that’s what is so awesome about this exercise.

Alright – UCLA Bruins against the Villanova Wildcats. This is actually kind of a tough one. I’ll use my Round 1 Arizona vs. Utes logic (which, BTW, worked in calling a 12 over a 5 upset) – Wildcats!

I am happy to choose the Duke Blue Devils over the Texas Longhorns. Yes, horns could pierce and kill, but these are blue devils. Other-worldly forces are at work (though that didn’t exactly work for those Demon Deacons…)

Okay – so let me be the first to say that I am crestfallen that the Radford Highlanders are no longer in the tourney. I was even willing to watch these Highlander movies so I could make better jokes. But alas, the Tar Heels found a way to win, but I’m going to stay true to nature’s course and pick the Tigers of LSU to best UNC. You will be a plaything for tigers, what with your heels stuck in tar and what not.

Next: Western Kentucky Hilltoppers against Gonzaga Bulldogs. What, you may be thinking, is a Hilltopper? It’s THIS guy:

Give me WKU… I feel like this guy could win over any creature with his hilarity.

And finally: Michigan Wolverines vs. Oklahoma Sooners. So let me get this straight… pioneers who wanted to get to a boring, flat state before anyone else vs. a wolverine… a wolverine also associated with Hotty McHotterson Hugh Jackman. No question: Go Big Blue!
Admittedly, I don’t think this post is anywhere near as funny as my last one, but it’s what you get. I think Sunday’s matchups look more promising. Who will win the Trojans-Spartans battle? Will the first round’s triumphant Dayton Flyers paper-cut their way to another win? Who knows… stay tuned tomorrow for another round of my musings!

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